Dear Person Who Found This Blog By Searching For “best words you can say to a parent thats [sic] giving up their child for adoption”:

Unless that parent has abused their child, is a hopeless drug addict, or incarcerated for some heinous crime, the best words you can say to a parent considering the voluntary termination of their parental rights and subsequent relinquishment of their child for adoption, is this:

“DON’T.”

The next best thing to say is this:

“Let me help you find a way to keep your child. Your child needs you, not some random strangers you picked out of an adoption agency catalog or off some slick website and then met with for lunch a couple of times. Your child needs you. Your child needs you.”* 

Adoption is a permanent solution to what are usually VERY temporary problems, especially in the eternal perspective.

Sincerely,

M.

*Always have to throw this disclaimer out there, lest anyone assume I “hate” adoption and adoptive parents: No, I don’t want babies to rot in orphanages or grow up in abusive homes. No, I am not anti-ALL-adoption-in-EVERY-situation, simply because I think mothers and their children should be given a chance. No, I don’t hate adoptive parents; in fact I have some very dear and close friends that are adoptive parents. My children even consider one of them as another Grandma in their life. What I am is pro-family preservation whenever possible.

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2 thoughts on “

  1. Amen! Its amazing what will bring people to our blogs…

    As for your disclaimer – lol! Sigh. Seems rather ridiculous you need to put one out there but I do understand why. And it would be nice if a PAP or person would be big enough to show this kind of empathy to help a woman get beyond her temporary problems. However, not holding my breath. There is no such thing as altruism or empathy leading to true compassion in our world these days… I pray this will change and I will be proven wrong as it is something I would dearly love to be wrong about! Sure there are a few people practising emapthy and compassion out there but it is not the majority and it would be great to see it become a majority, rather than a minority, rule.

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