This. is. So. Wrong.

Dear Ms. Feverfew:





UT_adoptee_siblingsSo very, very, very wrong.

It is wrong these people do not have access to the truth in the form of their original unaltered birth certificates.


It is wrong they have been denied factual information of their heritage. It is wrong they have to post their personal information on social networking sites, begging others to share their photos in the hopes they find their natural family.


As radical as it might seem to some, I believe adoptees should have complete and total access, with no veto ability by natural parents, to their unaltered original birth certificates at all times, even before the age of majority. If that were to happen, these adoptees would not have to post personal and private statistical information all over social networking sites.

searchingWhile I am infinitely grateful adoptees are having success connecting with their roots this way, e.v.e.r.y. single one of these photos convicts those of us who occupy a more privileged space than the adoptee.


Every single one of these pictures stands as a testament of the blatant discrimination existing in an adoptees life from the moment their adoption is finalized.

The non-adopted have unfettered access to their original birth certificates. Adoptees don’t. For no reason other than the adults in their life decided they shouldn’t. That is wrong. Adoptees did NOTHING to deserve the discrimination heaped on them by our closed records system.   They deserve and are entitled to their original birth records, whether they choose to pursue reunion or not.

There are those in Utah who are working on fixing the Utah Mutual Consent Adoption Registry to make it a bit more equitable for adoptees, but their efforts keep getting struck down by one member of the Eagle Forum. The laws weren’t fixed this legislative session, but I am going to do all that I can to see that they do get changed there in Utah.

OhioOpenUnlessClosed If miracles like the one above can happen in Ohio (open access, contact veto given the the ADOPTEE, not the natural parent!!!!), then they can happen in Utah as well.

Much love,


13 thoughts on “This. is. So. Wrong.

  1. Love this post. I agree with you that birthparents should not be allowed to decide if an adoptee receives his or her OBC or not. I was there on Wednesday when the Ohio House Judiciary Committee voted unanimously to send a bill giving Ohio adoptees adopted in 1964 through 1996 (which my son falls in this category) the right to their OBC on to the Ohio House. It was a lovely moment and I hope that HB 61 will continue to move through this process.

  2. So wrong too that adoptees should leave themselves vulnerable to explotation and deception -yes, it happens! None of the justifictions legislators and supporters use to justify keeping records closed have ever come to pass here in SA where we’ve had open access for decades.It’s time!

    • Exactly, Von! I see all of these pictures and one of the things that keeps percolating to the top of my consciousness is the absolute vulnerable position these adoptees have to assume, opening them up for all kinds of exploitation and deceit by those with no souls. It compounds and intensifies the sadness I feel for them, and the burning compassion I have for the cause of open adoption records. Adoptees shouldn’t be treated this way- no one should.

  3. I have thought about making one of these for my youngest sister whom we still have not found. All 5 of us kids were separated and adopted out in Utah in 1996. It is absolutely heartbreaking that we have no way to find her.

  4. I agree wholeheartedly with this post! I was born in 1964 and was adopted at 3 months of age. I found my birth mother in 1999, but I practically had to beg, borrow and steal to find her, because my records were sealed. I hope that the bill passes in Ohio so others do not have to go through what I did. Whether we want to find our birth parents or not, we should have the right, like everyone else, to our original birth certificates.

    • Murphy – I am glad you found your natural mother, in spite of these cruel and archaic laws!!!! Like you said, whether you want to find your natural parents or not is beside the point – adoptees have the right to their original birth certificates.


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