I was going to write a pithy and biting letter today about the prices attached to babies of various ethnic backgrounds and so I googled “available adoption situations.” One of the first hits on the list was “A Act of Love” [sic] adoption agency. Yes, that “A Act of Love.” Located in the heart of Utah. The one that brags on their website “Act of Love is famous in the adoption field for their special treatment and attention they give to birth mothers and adoptive families.” (Shouldn’t that be infamous???) The one that is so notorious for stomping all over father’s rights, for secreting expectant mothers or their newborn children across state lines to be adopted in Utah. I looked through their list of “situations” and saw this:
|3/4/2012||Caucasian-Polynesian/Caucasian||Unknown at this time|
My heart stopped beating and my breath seized in my throat.
Dear God, please don’t let that be you and your boyfriend. I could never forgive myself if you end up doing the same thing I have done to you. I don’t think I could survive knowing that you were going to go through what I have gone through for the last two decades.
I know the probability is practically nil it is you and your boyfriend but then again, what if it is you? Studies have shown that many adoptees who face an unplanned pregnancy do exactly what their mothers did to them – relinquish them for adoption. It’s almost like they are trying to complete or master what their own mothers could not, or something like that.
My head hurts thinking about this. My heart hurts. My whole body hurts.
Oh man, I need to go take a long walk. This is so not what I was planning on writing about this morning and I am nearly undone at the thought of it.